Sexually Responsible
[outline draft]
By Jeff Ginger
Last Update 10.15.06
Just an outline for now, I'll flush it out if I ever find time.
Responsibility defined as obligation, accountability, dependability.
Assumptions
-Sex as an integral and important part of any relationship, though maybe not a model for everyone, vast majority
-Couples who have better sex have happier and longer lasting marriges (and vise versa)*
-Not the only essential but a great building block
-Assumption that long lasting happy marriage is beneficial and the end objective
-Virginity is socially constructed and only given meaning from us - see argument for sex before marriage
Development
-Sex requires practice, also like relationships, no one knows what's best
-Wouldn't marry the first person you date, same policy for sex - figure out what you want and how you want it
-For something as important as marriage you should know all aspects of your partner - living with them, lifestyles,
morals, and salient here, confirmed sexual attraction and sexual chemistry
-Irresponsible to not know this much about your partner, adovacate knowing what it's like to be married before
marriage, the best kind of realistic preparation there could be
-Also accountable for your performance - should bring experienced, safe, and meaningful sex into marriage
-Confess that marriage, quinessentially is a title, a status assigned - people are no different day before and day
after, like most things in life it should be regarded as a transition from one state to another, best done not
in an immediate fashion. Just like one shouldn't start out right away on sex, but work up to it
So in summary
-obligated to know all facets of your partner as well as you can (I know, we change) to ensure a long-lasting
and fulfilling relationship - this includes sex
-accountable for performance and education (bringing enjoyable sex, knowing you'll like sex with them, and health)
-dependable - know they can count on your love and full intimacy - that both sides will really truly enjoy one
another in the bedroom
-Sex as a crucial part of relationships - something to be educated about and regarded in a realistic manner (best
achievable after one has had consistent sex)
-And yes I still do stress meaningful emotional sex as the ideal
*Sex, Love, and Health in America (Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press, 2001);
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